I’m going to attempt to live blog the performance finale of So You Think You Can Dance. I, however have the attention span of a goldfish. I’m also starting late. Classic me. 

 

So far Courtney and Twitch have danced. Courtney was wearing hideous pink plaid pants. NOT HER FAULT. GO COURTNEY. I love her. 

 

Mary is clearly drunk. 

 

It is break time. Courtney, go burn those pants.

 

Courtney’s bio. Have I mentioned I love her? Now she’s doing her solo to Missy Higgins, and I love her even more. I realize that I’m in the minority here. My sister, a real dancer person, hates her with the fire of 1,000 suns.

 

My sister is very bitter that Chelsie Hightower is no longer in the competitions. This makes her hate Courtney with the firey passion of 1,002 suns. She is now using her grief over Chelsie to guilt me into getting her milk. What next? Doing her laundry? Something involving a first born? 

Lauren’s now paranoid Courtney is going to read this and know that she hates her. So, Courtney Galliano, my sister doesn’t hate you. Just your knees, your feet, and your face. 

 

Just saw preview for new season of House. Squee.

 

BTW: What is going on with Kat’s eye makeup? Did they make her sleep on her face after she hit the chair?

 

I will be breaking in order to take in the awesomeness that i going to be Kaytee/Josh/Wade.

 

Oh, swoon, swoon, swoon. I love when they use John Mayer. I love Wade. May have to go see Wade’s magic show in Vegas. I still can’t believe Josh had no training before this show, nor that they gave poor Kaytee those bangs. 

 

And I’d like to add that I’m sad that Mandy Moore is on panel this week because I truly love her early 90’s music obsession. I was hoping for a heartfelt Amy Grant number tonight. No, I’m not kidding. However, I’m willing to bet we get some Mia tonight. We haven’t seen her in weeks. We’re betting she gets  either the girl-girl or the boy-boy number, but who knows? Lauren’s also betting that we see some work from Travis tonight. Maybe even Benji.

 

OMG TYCE.

OMG. TYCE! Ok, I was disappointed by that. We both were. First of all, what’s with all the doing Broadway style dances in bare feet this season? If the dancers always have to wear heels for ballroom, put them in character shoes for Broadway. It looks awkward. The whole thing was awkward, like a recital duet between two dance school seniors that don’t particularly like each other. And I’m a HUGE Tyce and Broadway fan. 

 

Courtney is really getting ripped on in judging tonight. I feel like they’re hinting at the audience that she doesn’t deserve to win. Everything they’re saying about her technique is true, but when Will got voted off clearly voting for the best dancer went out the window, and as Nigel reminded us, this show is about America’s FAVORITE (FAVOURITE?) Dancer. That was when I got on the Courtney train.

Anyway, last year foxes this year frilly dresses? The girls are getting screwed. 

BTW: I know I should be using time stamps, but I’m trying to enjoy the show, too. Comprende?

 

Ok. how did we never hear about the Josh/Twitch fued before? And a Russian WHAT?!

 

My quads are burning for both of those boys. Both Kat and Mary look a little hot and bothered. I would like to reiterate that the girls got screwed.

 

Mandy Moore, you are a foot nazi. One of the things I noticed during Kaytee’s solo is that I thought her feet looked fantastic, but what do I know?

 

I would like to this commercial break to whine about the SYTYCD camera work. This has been bothering us for episodes, nay, seasons. According to my sister, there’s petitions about the poor camera work on the discussion boards. I know they’re trying to make the pieces more dynamic for the television viewing audience, but it totally ruins the experience by editing the choreographers’ intended vision. When choreographers make dances, they keep the way they use the space in mind. Negative space is important, don’t zoom it out. Don’t cut dancers out of the frame, or make the frame so tight that they can dance out of it before the camera can catch up. Don’t move around so much that we lose the perspective of the dance. STAY STILL. WE’LL BE THRILLED. 

 

In other news, our mom likes Courtney. Lauren is SO biased because of the Chelsie factor. Also, Lauren might need a 12-Step for her John and Kate Plus Eight addiction. 

 

WOOT! WE ARE GOING TO THE ADDED BOSTON SHOW. 4TH ROW! Ahem. 

 

I love Foxtrot, but where the hell is Mia?

 

But I only liked this foxtrot. Does that really cut it for the finale? Michael Bublé was an excellent choice though. I just feel like they wouldn’t have been as excited about this routine on any old episode.

 

FINALLY! MIA AFTER THE BREAK! So, no Travis tonight, however we know from my sister (QUEEN OF THE BOARDS) that he must be choreographing for tomorrow’s results show. Why? Because Denise Wall, Travis’ mom, wrote it on her blog/dance studio site, obviously. Lauren is NEVER allowed to make fun of me for loving blogs again.

 

Mentally preparing for the glory that is Mia Michaels.

 

Oh, right, Josh first. I want to pinch his cheeks. You give that booty to Nigel, Josh!

 

Back to preparing for the Mia.

 

OOOOH! ooooh! AAAAAH! Our heads just exploded from confusion and realization. MIA MICHAELS TOP 4. This will be even better. Twitch and Courtney jive. Interesting. Definitely not Travis, but interesting.

 

OMG Courtney got so screwed with costumes this week. First those pink plaid pants, then a leotard? Just a leotard? With CROTCH FRINGE? And THOSE BOOTS? Aside from the way they wreck the poor girl’s lines, they are just HIDEOUS. 

 

Serious kudos to them for the way they pulled that out. It would be impressive any other day, but it’s damn near miraculous on a day like today. I can’t even imagine the rehearsal time they must be putting in this week. And Lauren just pointed out that they must be rehearsing the dances from previous episodes so they can perform the highlights tomorrow night. Can’t believe they don’t take an extra week off. Insanity. And, Nigel, I agree that you shouldn’t coddle the dancers, but how about you give them a fair shot and have them do their ass breaking jive at the beginning of the damn show? 

 

Last commercial break? What is with the Sim ladies in the Nuva Ring commercial? Seriously disturbing. And holler, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2!

 

FINALLY MIA TIME!

 

Wow, interesting. What a difficult piece of music to hear. And boy was Josh feeling it. I love when it looks like a dancer is making the music with his or her body, not just dancing to it. We were both watching the boys more than the girls, and I don’t think it was the bare chested kilt thing. Courtney looked awkward, but that might have been because of her horrid red dress. What did she do to piss off wardrobe? Seriously? As Lauren put it, she looks like she’s taking a spaceshit to Scotland. I don’t know why one would take a SPACESHIP to Scotland, but ok. 

 

And I think Mary might have been blackballed by wardrobe, too. Really with the eyeliner? And the weave?

 

Tonight’s conclusions:

 

Wardrobe and makeup are clearly on a rampage or drunk. 

 

And that’s it.

 

Vote!

Goodnight!

 

*For my very first time. I’ve participated as the snarky sidekick in the live blogs of others, but never manned one of my own. Thanks for reading/plodding along with me!